I’m not sure what it is that I’m doing wrong. Is it my writing style? Is it my content? Am I not pretty enough? Am I not honest enough? Am I not raw enough?
I read lots of other blogs. I comment on lots of blogs. I participate in linkys and memes. And yet I feel stuck.
There are so few comments on most posts. Unless it’s a competition and even then I am surprised by how few people enter the ones not worth hundreds of dollars.
I even ask questions at the end of most posts, but few people respond.
Is it the titles? Am I boring? Am I too “all over the place”? All of the above?
I am steadily growing followers and likers, but my overall stats are sitting steady. Even that in itself would not worry me, if I knew that people were enjoying my blog, if they were talking back to me. That only seems to happen when I write one of my “inspired”, “in the moment” sad and painfully emotional posts. The others are received in a rather luke warm manner.
So I ask you, dear reader, particularly if you also blog, what am I doing wrong? I welcome all advice, I want to get better at writing, at grabbing your attention. Please help….?
First Post!! Lol
I find your style easy to read and interesting. I must admit, I have lots of blogs that I should read, but time gets away from me 🙂
Good on you for asking.
Dorothy, I'm fairly new to mummy blogging (6 months) and only just starting to get to know other mummy bloggers in the last few months.
So, I haven't got to know many blogs very intimately – including yours, I admit. Still getting to know everyone.
You know I really liked your guest post on Planning With Kids, which inspired a whole post I wrote.
Saw your Tweet about this post. Read the whole post and now commented.
So, obviously you're doing something (a lot of things) right.
I think ProBlogger's ebook – 31 Days To Build A Better Blog is really good. Has heaps of tips.
I agree with Lina and Lee! Steady has got to be good too. I find that I don't always get comments but I know people read it because of other comments that are made through FB or twitter too. Not everyone has time to write back or can think of a thoughtful enough reply. Sometimes i have a billion windows open of every thing I want to read, outside of google reader and blogger dashboard and then the kids get in the way and here I am standing up at my tall computer table at 11.52pm trying to fit in some reading before the next kid wakes up. Hmmm rambling, hope it helps though Dorothy.
I think you write beautifully, Dorothy. I'm fairly new to blogging and don't post as consistently as most others. I'm still learning about and discovering many blogs. I wish I had more time to read, write and comment. Life (namely 3 little kidlets) takes up most of my time. I find that I comment more, and probably receive most of my feedback and comments via Facebook. I spend more time posting on Facebook than I do on my blog. I find I build a great rapport with readers and potential readers that way. I'm slowly starting to do link ups with other blogs I love. I'm still learning a lot. Don't be disheartened. Your blog is wonderful and from the heart. Most importantly, it should be for you, and about you, that's what makes you unique. xx
I dont think you are doing anything wrong. I have a similar problem in that I know people read my blog but they dont comment. That is frustrating, but I guess maybe people think they dont have anything to offer or dont know the right thing to say or they dont have time to comment meaningfully. But trust me, you're pretty enough and people like you!
I had a post get 70 views the other day, kind of a big deal for me, and not one comment. Comments are not so common these days, and I can only speak of my own experience as a commentor as to why. Time. It is nothing to do with most blog post that I read, they are not bad post or poorly written, it's just unless it is highly relevant to something I can relate to I just can't spare the time. Commenting on Things I Know on Friday is a big effort, but I don't do every post, I chose about 6-8, and return comments to visitors. Similar for Sunday Selections. But, sadly, my Miss 4 gives me very little time to blog these days, so commenting is the thing that has had to slide for me
I feel a bit like this at times. I try to focus on blogging for myself and not the feedback, but let's face it, if we didn't want the comments we'd be writing a journal instead.
Personally, I'm a terrible commenter. I don't get time to sit and comment very often, and even then, it's hard to come up with a comment that hasn't been made already. But I'm trying to work on that.
Try not to let it worry you Dorothy, just keep writing and sharing the love and they will surely come.
I know I struggle to find the time to comment on all the blogs I want to.
Sometimes I write a comment that gets swallowed by the commenting program and I give up, other times what I want to say has already been said and I hate leaving a comment at Great Post so just say nothing. I probably shouldn't do that either…
Interesting post! I often wonder the same thing, and can tie myself up in knots wondering/worrying about it. Then I just remind myself I blogged for a whole year before I got my first comment, before I know there was a “community” and I wasnt so bothered then.
I try to invest time in reading and commenting on blogs but some days its impossible so I am one to flit in and out of people's blog worlds with a touch of irregularity at times. Does me no favours I am sure! But do admit I sometimes wonder why the people who's blogs I read religiously never stop by mine so much. It's not their fault, its just my insecurities at play. In an ideal world we'd all have the time to read and comment at will 🙂
I have to tell myself as long as I am happy with it, then that's the main thing. I'll never be a raw and raucous as others and that is ok.
maybe your blog just isn't that sort of community. i know goddess leonie (at goddess guide book dot com) closed her comments – she never got many to start with. she said her tribe just aren't commenters. but nevertheless, she's built an online community around her blog that now supports her family…
Interesting point, Kazari. I will check her out to see how she has built that community. Thank you…
Thanks for stopping by, Lina. I’m the same. I read a few blogs just about all the time, often leaving comments, however I’ve only received a few reciprocal comments from those bloggers. And frankly, I don’t expect them. I think the strategy of commenting to get traffic needs to be used in a fairly targeted way.
Sometimes I discover a great blog and then don’t go back to it for months. There are just so many awesome bloggers out there.
I think guest posting is a much better strategy to get traffic, but not necessarily comments. I think there is a trick to converting a one-off visitor to a regular reader. Again, something I need to work on…
I am just a useless commenter. I really have to have something to say, as well as the time and then comments box has to actually work too. I hate how you have to sign in again (even though I swear I tell it to remember me) and I just selfishly find it a lot of effort. Often I read on my phone or iTouch and then I REALLY don't even try.
I’m the same when it comes to reading blogs on the phone. I try to comment, but then my comment gets lost as I try to go through all the hoops to sign in.
I appreciate your posts but rarely comment. I also don't write back to a lot of book authors I enjoy – it doesn't take away from how much I loved their books. Its a time thing, mostly… so much to read, so little time. I spend (too) many stolen moments reading blogs I love but if I reply I wouldn't be able to read as much. Just keep doing what you do, you are reaching more people than you know. xx
Allison Tait from Life in the Pink Fibro wrote a great post about the difference between writing and blogging. For most of us, as bloggers, the main aim of what we do is to connect with others. To not only be heard, but to be talked to. We are looking to engage with our readers, to generate discussion, to hear about others' experiences. I know that that is not true for all bloggers, but as one of the other commenters said earlier, if we just wanted to write down what we thought and not hear about what impact that had on others, we would all still be writing in our paper journals.
I so totally understand the time thing. Over the last couple of days, however, I've tried to read fewer blogs, but comment on those that really connected with me. Just to let the blogger know that someone is listening.
I've been busy lately (about a month) and am just catching up on all my favourite blogs. Took me ages to get through Woogsworld, lol and I haven't blogged myself since I don't remember when – life's just gotten in the way, I'll get back to it soon enough.
The thing that drew me to your blog is your story. It made me feel good when you were having a good day and angry and upset when you weren't. To be honest (I assume that's what you want) you're a great writer but I get the feeling that you're trying too hard. Just be yourself, write for yourself – that's when you're at your best. I understand your needs for comments – I don't worry too much about them but I have to say when Eden commented on one of my posts, it made my fucking day!
Like I said, I haven't been around lately but I'm so glad to see you're in a happy place.
Thank you for your comment. I'm glad you enjoy my blog, mostly. I guess I'm a little taken aback by you saying that I “try too hard”. I'm not really sure what you mean by that. I admit that some posts come easier than others. I write about a range of things and have to say that sometimes I feel like I'm channeling some other bloggers, depending on what I'm writing about.
As a blogger, comments give me a connection with my readers, they help me see that I'm not alone, that others are there reading, thinking about me. Most days I don't get even get to speak to another adult, so one or two comments on a post are a big deal…. It may be sad and I probably should do something about this, however it's still my reality and I try to deal with it the best I know how.
Well I'm just plain hopeless at commenting… but I am trying to turn that around because… well, everything you just wrote is what I'm feeling and thinking.
I'm hoping that if I become more 'active' {and by active I dont mean just reading, but commenting too} hopefully that will encourage others to comment my way as well. Of course I am in truth probably too boring over at my blog so I need to do something about that also! LOL I blog about my life {and although eventful and stressful I am not very raw in my writing}, I really dont impart anything to anyone either, like something others would WANT to share, I don't do reviews, or giveaways {not against them, just haven't looked into it – maybe some day}. Maybe my including those things will perk things up for me?Oh and I'm horrifically inconsistent in that when life gets busy I bail on my blogging and community {like I did in August}… so after 3 weeks people have probably forgotten who I am!? Anyway thats my 2 cents on why I think I'm in the same predicament. But Dorothy I must say, I am sorry, I'm one of your readers who flys in, reads and zooms back out again. It's rather rude of me really isn't it? Kind of like 'stealing'. I do have another question to add to yours and the whole blogging networking how's…. how on earth when I follow and support almost 100 bloggers do I keep up!?!?! I've recently taken to Facebook more and use that as my news feed because I've found the blogger one too hard to 'chew through'. But by the time I read and comment, I have no time left for my own blog! This feels like it really should be a full time occupation dont you think? 😉
LOL, Carly, being a blogger is definitely a full time job if you want it to be. There are other blogs to read, comments to make, Twitter relationships to establish and maintain, events to go to, forums to read and comment on. Really, it is never ending. I follow heaps of blogs, but I don't get to them all time. There are some that I am now frequenting daily and others as I see the posts on Twitter or Facebook. As someone has said to me on Twitter a few days ago, the more you put into the blogging community, the more you get.